So as part of our challenges, I have (un)wisely chosen one that has slipped through the net of recent PPV Rants. I’ll be honest and say I’m a wrestling relic who would’ve and perhaps should’ve reviewed a ‘classic’ but hey what the hell! A note of caution, I am English so expect an extra ‘u’ thrown in words once in a while, I hope this beast of a review/essay entertains.


We open with the traditional hype package – sometimes it seems that on video packages alone the WWE could make a Funaki/Brawler feud look like it’s Wrestlemania worthy. One note worth mentioning is the voiceover’s proclamation that this was their last chance to headline WrestleMania…get the feeling it won’t be Kofi Kingston no matter how many times they feature him in this video.


So onto the show, cue pyro etc. Our commentators tonight are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Matt Stryker, and the ominous sound of the elimination chamber begins, as we kick off with Raw title match as Justin Roberts does his impression of a bad mix of the Fink and Michael Buffer to tell us the rules for the first of many…many times tonight;


WWE Champion Sheamus vs. John Cena vs. Randy Orton vs. Triple H vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Ted Dibiase (Elimination Chamber Match)


First up is the WWE’s premier African-American star John Cena, who gets a good but high pitched pop upon entering. Quite a good cheer for a curtain jerker as Matt Stryker begins a night of questionable commentary by stating Cena is ‘one of the most controversial superstars ever’. I think Messrs Benoit, Von Erich, and Pillman might argue that point. Well they would if they were alive.


Next out is Ted Dibiase, who is met with apathy to the extent that they decide now is the time to introduce us to the commentators, where once again Matt Stryker makes me think twice about his skills by informing us ‘The Chamber can be your mansion if you’re willing to mortgage your career…’ That’s one hell of a real estate term and condition – and I’m guessing with hindsight that Dibiase didn’t get the bankers’ approval seeing how he’s currently feuding with Goldust.


Our next man out is Randy Orton, whose cheers are deeper than Cena’s fan base. Looks like someone invested in too much baby oil, no wonder he’s slippery like a viper…wait what do you mean that’s not why he’s called that?! Anyway as he enters the ring the commentators build tension amongst Legacy members as Orton and Dibiase make eye contact, followed a kiss, and a nice meal…or maybe just the first part, but you know there’s tension.


Man number 4 is Triple H, sporting quite the sympathy weight. Stryker (again) says Triple H has a ‘blood stained relationship with the WWE championship’…I guess they like it kinky in Connecticut. Even the water spot gets a pop, that’s right H20 is more over than Ted Dibiase right now.


Kofi Kingston is contestant number 5, the odds on favourite…to be eliminated first. One of the first two combatants, and it’s mentioned how last year Edge ambushed him and stole his spot…might as well make it two years running buddy, you’re not winning this one either.


Out last is our champion Sheamus, I must mention how much I despise that title design, but at least the champ makes me feel good about my pasty complexion – but seriously just over the river from Ireland, us Brits are not that milky. Over ten minutes into this legally acquired non YouTube version of the PPV and we’re only just wrapping up the entrances as Sheamus shows off the title to each of the wrestlers in the pods. Cena responds with his ‘You can’t see me’ gesture – silly Cena, it’s see-through, of course he can see you!


We get straight into the action as the champ misses a pump kick as Kofi takes charges with some kicks to the sides. An early cross-body gets a 1-count, followed by an arm bar, which the Irishman rebuffs with a knee, uppercuts (European?), and Michael Cole informs us how the champion has ‘changed the complexion of the WWE’ at which point the King beats me to the next Sheamus = pasty joke. Back to the action which is to and (a)fro or more to the point punches and kicks. The commentators provide more entertainment by listing off the achievements of Triple H, Cena, and Orton…you’d be forgiven for thinking there were only 5 men in this match. The crowd amuses itself with a Cena/Cena Sucks chant.


The match is taken to the outside…more punch-kick loving to be had, where Sheamus breaks the fun up with a hold! Credit to him, it was a nice looking Urinage backbreaker which gets a 2-count. The lights go down for our third competitor, and it’s Triple H. He shares a stare down with Sheamus, and the crowd pops for it including a Triple H chant. Meanwhile Kofi takes the opportunity to catch some rest as Sheamus launches an attack for all of 5 seconds before the Game breaks out the traditional high knee, knee drop combo. He then proceeds to kick the Celt out of the champ in the corner as Kofi is still resting. As the actions spills to the outside, Sheamus blocks an attempt to be thrown into the cage, followed by his attempts blocked by Triple H and suffers a clothesline back into the ring.


Matt Stryker notes that the Game called this ‘a Chamber of Horrors’…I’ve seen that match, there is no ‘Chair of Torture’ here, or coffins, or a switch which falls down by itself. Where’s El Gigante, well we know where he is now, but this was back in February?! No excuses! Now where was I? Ah, the match. Sheamus has his finisher blocked as Triple H escapes for a DDT and a 2-count. Kofi, who must’ve been sleeping on the outside catches both men with a cross body on his way back in, followed up by a 10 punch in the corner on Sheamus. He gets psyched up running round the ring, and hits a Boom Drop on Triple H on the outside, but before he can enjoy the moment, he gets a clothesline from the champ, which gets a 2-count.


We get the countdown again and this time the crowd pops for Orton who goes for Sheamus, beating yet another mud hole in him, followed by a clothesline for Triple H. After a little beating on Kofi, he goes back to his former Evolution buddy with a high knee. HE takes Sheamus to the outside and introduces him to the steel 3 times, and Triple H comes out for the same treatment. Kofi jumps out to all of three of them as we get our first replay of the night. Orton crawls back in the ring and counters Kofi’s springboard attack with a dropkick, which admittedly stuns me that it didn’t get a 3-count. Triple H re-enters the fray as we return to our punching and kicking, ended soon after by a powerslam reversal by Orton who then starts his stalking for an RKO attempt. Another side note, how does pounding your fists on the floor help with this move?! Apparently it does not, as Orton is pushed into Kingston’s path, who misses with a kick. Pedigrees attempt on Orton results in Triple H is pushed outside the ring. Kofi and Sheamus make their way round, as not to miss out, as the timer counts to reveal Ted Dibiase as our next contestant.


He makes his way over to Orton, extending his hand to help his mentor. Together they work over Triple H as the King cries foul that it should be ‘every man for himself’, sorry King, the Rumble was last month! After this, they turn their attention towards Sheamus, throwing him into the ring post, and finally they move onto Kofi. In an amusing spot they try and push Kofi’s head through the cage…and it goes through! Dibiase then locks in a Boston Crab that admittedly looks impressive with the opponents head stuck in the chamber. Back in the ring where Legacy turn their attention back to Triple H where Stryker points out there’s never been a Raw elimination chamber where all 6 men have been in at once; considering one chamber once featured Batista, Khali, and Big Daddy V, there’s a damn fine reason for that! I am also aware that that match was on the Blue brand, but a half decent musing be damned!


We return to the match with Triple H bouncing off the cage, followed by Orton’s DDT through the ropes. 2/3rds of Legacy then proceed to wait outside Cena’s pod, as he will be our last man out. Naturally once the countdown is over, Cena comes out fighting, flying shoulders all round! A facebuster on Dibiase is followed by a leg drop from the top. He picks him for the AA catching Orton on the way round, dumping Dibiase outside, only to follow shortly after as Randy throws him out for a VERY weak looking bump. Cole is quick to cover up stating that it looked like Cena fell ‘fairly lightly’. So lightly in fact that he is able to recover and throw Orton into the cage/cell/chamber/mortgage broker.


Cena goes back in the ring to apply the STF on the other Legacy member but its thwarted by Orton, as we get a full set as Cody Rhodes runs down to ringside, lead pipe in tow. After throwing it in the ring, he is able to watch as his mentor is picked up for the AA and then walloped on the head with the pipe by Dibiase, after which Cena is treated to a similar fate. In a twist that even Ray Charles spotted, Dibiase pins Orton for the 3 count whilst Cody looks on nervously. Sheamus decides that this is a good time to awaken by pouncing on Ted for all of 5 seconds before falling on the floor, all the while Randy looks on with a look of confusion, or betrayal, I’m not sure, I find him bland and unemotional at best.


Back to the action where Sheamus drags what’s left of Kofi into the ropes where the mauling is reversed into a flip over the ropes – oh Kofi! You’re Jamaican me dizzy!…well it was worth a try. Trouble in Paradise out of nowhere on Dibiase and he’s out of there! His moment in the sun lasted long…about as long as Kingston’s, whom Sheamus catches with a Pump Kick. Razor’s Edge for the 3-count. 3 down, 3 to go, and we’re left with multi-time WWE champions Triple H and John Cena, and our current champion Sheamus; one of these is not like the others – that’s right, it’s Cena, because he’s black.


Speaking of the Doctor of Thuganomics, Sheamus kicks him around, only to be caught in an AA attempt, which in turn is reversed into a backbreaker by our pasty white champ. A powerslam by Sheamus for a 2-count results in high-pitched cheers for Cena’s survival. Sheamus ties him up in a tree of woe and digs Cena in the ribs with a few knees, pulling him up for a transition into…actually I’m not sure what his finisher is called. Using the source of all knowledge, Wikipedia it’s called a few things – I’ll go with Celtic Cross, yeh he picks Cena up for it but all that ‘research’ was for nought as Triple H recovers to deliver a low blow. Feel free to insert your own lucky charms joke here. A pedigree later and we’re down to two, and a new champion will be crowned – Cena or Triple H, and somewhere the internet cries a little for the choice they’ve been left with, personally these two don’t offend me too much, then again, I found Simon Dean an amusing character so perhaps I’m not a good judgement of tolerance.


Anyway there’s a match going on and in less time than it took me to type that last distraction Cena has locked in the STFU, whilst Hunter wriggles around in desperation to escape. Cole shouts out at least four times that he’s got to get onto his back to escape the hold in less than a minute…we get it…we got it the first time…unfortunately for the Game, he didn’t as a nice visual of him clawing for the ropes is followed by him tapping out, John Cena is the new champion! No booing audible, so an improvement!


Winner and new WWE Champion: John Cena


Overall the match was good but a little lagging at times where the rest spots took a little too long. A couple of nice spots including the Boston Crab on Kofi whilst his head was stuck through the cage. It’s hard to rate this match in the same fashion as a regular match but it was indeed enjoyable, even if at the end, each elimination came quicker than a CM Punk push comes and goes.


Before John Cena can enjoy his moment, the cage rises and the music of Mr McMahon hits the arena as he waddles out much like a man with crap in his pants, but hey he’s wealthy, has Divas at his disposal, and basically gets to make his employees do whatever he wants to…perhaps we should all start walking like that. He congratulates Cena on making it to the main event for WrestleMania, that is if he can win his match, right now;


WWE Champion John Cena vs. Batista


The Animal makes his way to the ring with a smile on his face, quickly wiped off by a staggering Cena, who connects with a right hook. The reply is a killer spear followed by a Batista Bomb. A 3-count and we have another new champion!


Winner and new WWE Champion: Batista


Remember when someone held a belt for longer than a week? As much as the spear looked good, I get cranky when titles change hands like this. When the Warrior creamed the Honky Tonk Man in a minute at Summerslam ’88 it announced him to the wrestling world as a new star, what Batista did here was unnecessary, and with hindsight, seeing as this was to be the title match at WrestleMania, why not just build up the feud with the Animal chasing the champ? I’d like to say this will be the only time I’ll appear to be jaded and behind the times, but I fear it wont be for this review. A squash is a squash, can’t recommend one, not at this level anyway.


 As our new champ leaves, Cena crawls towards the rope, grasping at thin air in the direction of the WrestleMania banner, poor John, with his money, fame, and endless supplies of merchandise. As he leaves the ring, a small chant begins, more looking at the banner, and he walks up the ramp to end our first match (and a half) of the evening.


WrestleMania ad, and I shudder as they show a clip from the Diva’s battle royal – Santino = comedy, and occasionally a good storyline, Santina = pain.


Back to the show, where the commentators talk over the reasoning of the last match, referencing the Bret Hart saga, where he finally returned only to receive a nut shot from McMahon. I told you that guy could do anything. Raw highlights now, my recap will be much shorter – Bret’s farewell, Cena’s pep talk, car’s reversing, Ambulance sirens.


Next match! It will be for the Intercontinental title as Drew MacIntyre enters first. Either the sound quality has gone funny or the crowd don’t give a crap for him as he makes his way to the ring. For the record, being English doesn’t mean I must root my fellow Brit, especially if he continues to lack any charisma, and considering his opponent is Kane, I’m not confident he’ll win me over. Point of interest, isn’t the challenger supposed to come out first?!


WWE Intercontinental Champion Drew MacIntyre vs. Kane


The ring posts flare as Kane enters and we begin with the challenger missing a few rights, as MacIntyre looks to get an early advantage, stopped quickly by an uppercut. A low dropkick gets a 1-count. Headlock takedown by Kane as Stryker breaks out a stat; 20% of Intercontinental champions have gone on to be inducted into the Hall of Fame – I wonder if the likes of Jeff Jarrett and Chyna hold onto that stat as hope. Another takedown by the Big Red Machine and I want to pretend I can’t see them discussing their match plan as a swinging neckbreaker by Kane distracts me and gets a 2-count. He misses a charge in the corner as the champ hits a few short clotheslines, before Kane treats him to one of his own. A missed back elbow leads to work on the leg, for all of two seconds, reason be damned! Drew charges in the corner only to be lifted over, catch himself on the apron, and yank Kane’s arm over the ropes as he drops to the floor. So now it appears he will work on the arm instead!


When the action returns to the ring Kane gets backed into a corner but fights out with some right hooks only for the momentum to be stopped by an armbreaker that barely registers a 1-count. Armbar now as King offers up his crown should this rest hold be successful! The challenger gets up and manages to push MacIntyre over the ropes to break the hold. Didn’t look the smoothest of landings but he’s back in the ring soon enough, avoiding a back bodydrop, delivering another armbreaker, and another 1-count. Back to the armbar as Kane rallies, whipping his opponent into the ropes only to be caught with a big boot! Did not see that one coming.


A reversal on a Future Shock attempt and a big boot for Kane to regain the advantage although as soon as I’ve written that it becomes time for MacIntyre to dictate, until he goes up top, and like most people who face Kane, the end result is a uppercut counter. Irish whip and side slam for 2. Top rope time for Kane as he connects with a flying clothesline. He signals for a chokeslam but MacIntyre escapes, rolling to the apron, but is caught and thrown into the ring post. Kane joins his prey on the apron and boots him off to the floor. One headshot into the stairs later and we’re back in the ring as MacIntyre begs off only to get a kick to the face as a response. Rolling to the outside, he draws the boos of the crowd who do not like the idea of a count out finish. A punch to the face prevents Kane from taking the Scot back into the ring straight away, but a headbutt means he will have his bonny (check your history books folks, its all relevant) backside thrown back in. Another chokeslam attempt is backed into the ropes, where the ref has to intervene, which allows MacIntyre to stick a thumb in the challenger’s eye. With the Big Red Machine reeling, the champ hits the Future Shock DDT and retains his title.


Winner and still Intercontinental Champion: Drew MacIntyre


As he leaves, Kane sells the eye injury more than anything else he received during that match. The commentators mention how this means MacIntyre remains undefeated…in the same way his opponent is no longer a rapist, necrophiliac, monster with severe arsonist tendencies. Despite these oversights, this match surprised me as I was expecting a slower pace and dreaded the worse when the armbars where being put into practice early on. MacIntyre didn’t help himself by working on the arm, then the leg, then the arm, and then nothing, but this match could’ve been a lot worse.


We cut to the back where Maryse is catching up with Gail Kim. She speaks in French only to offer to translate it into English straight away – why bother with the French then woman?! The twist – Gail Kim understands her, and cuts down her opponent about the continental crap she’s been chatting. Which leads nicely into our next match;


WWE Diva’s Title Tournament Finals: Maryse vs. Gail Kim


Maryse comes out first as Stryker and King drool over her. The chatter of lonely middle aged men continues as Gail Kim comes out, and don’t get wrong, there’s nothing wrong with these ladies, it’s just I have to call this match whilst the commentators dribble and babble more so than usual. It also doesn’t help that the belt they’re fighting for looks like a Barbie accessory. There have been good woman’s matches in my time, I would like to hope this will be one of them but as soon as I’ve had this thought a familiar screech can be heard – it’s Vickie Guerrero. She complains about all the smack-talk the Raw Divas have been giving the Smackdown Divas, turning this title match into what I feared – a tag match. Out come Lay-Cool and out goes my hope of a decent match. The things us rookies must endure!


Divas Tag Match: Gail Kim and Maryse vs. Michelle McCool and Layla


First racist joke of the evening as Matt Stryker notes how you can watch one Gail Kim match, and have room for another 20 minutes later…I wonder if he told those kinds of jokes in his classroom.


Gail Kim and Layla to start off, arm drags, and wrist locks to start, and as Gail Kim makes her towards Maryse for a tag, her partner ignores it and this distraction allows Layla to escape the hold and pull off a nifty small package for a 2-count. Lots of shouting and kicking from one half of Lay-Cool as a charge meets nothing but turnbuckle, but a distraction by Maryse to her team mate means Michelle McCool is able to kick Gail Kim off the turnbuckle. Tag in to Mrs ‘Taker, and a double baseball slide by Lay-Cool to keep Kim on the outside for longer. McCool bangs the head of Gail Kim on the apron, and most likely many watching at home are doing similar things as these ladies fight. Chinlock applied to the Korean-Canadian-American? The Smackdown Divas take the time to applaud themselves as my attention span wanes, but Gail Kim gets the action going again with a flying clothesline. Both women are down, and Maryse is stretching her arm out for the hot tag only to withdraw and pie-face her partner, who turns around and eats a boot from McCool. One Styles Clash later and we have our winners, who taunt the fallen Kim, and leave the ring allowing Maryse to get her moment of bragging.


Winners: Michelle McCool and Layla


Well, it wasn’t a car wreck but a singles match might have been better. This match could’ve been done on Raw or Smackdown but instead we get it on a PPV.


Ad for NXT, that’ll never take off…. although I find irony that the rookies are still employed whilst Carlito is not. We got backstage for more NXT talk …your PPV money at work folks! On a positive note, he’s here talking to the Miz. I won’t lie; I’m a fan of this guy. I find it a crime he isn’t on the front of the European version of the new game. I’d like to think I see potential early, I did with Brock Lesnar, and I did with Batista. I however, did the same with Mr Kennedy and it never panned out. I’ll wait until he wins the title before I break out the Miz love.


Miz is asked about his rookie – Daniel Bryan. He dismisses him despite his Internet following and Indy Success, comparing him to a sci-fi nerd, and he even manages to throw in a dig at the St. Louis Rams. Despite the NFL playing in London recently, we don’t do American Football, hell after the World Cup I’m not sure we do any kind of football. For the record however, go Titans! Before Miz can finish his interview M.V.P interrupts, mentioning his victory over him on Raw, meaning we’ll be getting ourselves a U.S title match tonight.


Back to ringside where fellow Brit William Regal makes his way to ringside but not in his wrestling gear which means more NXT talk – could this not be done on Raw? The crowd shares my sentiment as they break into a ‘WHAT?’ chant. He’s demanding to be treated with respect – dude you’re going to be on NXT it’s not going to happen, just be glad you’re not being asked to marry your rookie or anything…


Anyway, interruption ahoy! It’s Edge. Face Edge lacks a certain something that makes me care about him and I have to complain that the Royal Rumble winner, who will be in a main event at WrestleMania, is not actually in a match in the build-up PPV to the biggest of the year! This is a Raw segment at best, and in fact Edge encourages us to watch Raw tomorrow night to find out who he will choose to face (Hint; it won’t be Batista). He spears Regal to end an unnecessary segment and after another WrestleMania package we move onto our next match;


WWE U.S Title Champion The Miz vs. M.V.P


My boy the Miz, accompanied by the Big Show, M.V.P accompanied by Mark Henry, who looks very much like a mascot for a certain drink…cue stealing someone else’s hard worked Photoshop. They show Raw highlights of M.V.P pinning the United States champ whilst Cole mentions how M.V.P posts online, someone should tell Matt Hardy to do the same, the Internet could do wonders for his career.


Bell rings, they face off, Miz jaws off, so MVP attempts to slap said jaw off. An aggressive start with knees to the gut, and an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Whilst the Miz takes a breather on the outside, the commentators begin comparing M.V.P’s former jailbird lifestyle to that of Tiger Woods’ recent extramarital affairs...not quite the same thing, I don’t think M.V.P had the same options of women where he was staying.


The Big Show can be heard cheering on the champ, and between him and Mark Henry, the world of cheerleading is looking decisively fat. Flying forearm by the challenger leads into a rest hold, at which point things slow down. Heels should use this spot, it allows the crowd to get behind their guy, and rally them to overcome the odds. When a face uses a weak looking rest hold, it just looks like they’re out of ideas. Rant over, and if I get the chance to write again, I’ll try to be more positive!


Miz gets out of the hold, throwing M.V.P into the turnbuckle and catching him in the gut with his knees. More pimping of NXT by the commentators, as King notes how Daniel Bryan may know more about wrestling then the United States champion, the internet rejoices a little at that one. Speaking of which, the Miz misses a kick, and ends up in a small package, but only for a 2-count, and the challenger gets a kick in the face for not getting up quick enough after the attempt. Makes you think, if he had quicker reaction times, he might not have ended up in prison!


This kick gets a lazy 2-count and sets up a scene similar to M.V.P’s roll-up from last week’s Raw but it doesn’t succeed this time, and the jailbird gets another kick in the face for his slow reaction times. Some cocky kicks from the champ are ended by a swinging right from M.V.P and I realise Mark Henry has added nothing to this match so far, not even a menacing look! As soon as I’ve said this, he starts scratching his head as he watches his partner get taken down with a clothesline – you earn that paycheque!


We see how a rest hold should be done as Miz holds down his opponent with a chinlock which is turned into an electric chair drop, followed by a bridge pin for 2. Somehow Miz still has control of the match after this, hitting a DDT and going back to the hold, which gets an M.V.P chant going – see told you it works. Trademark clothesline in the corner as Miz’s attempt to go up top end with M.V.P jumping to the ropes, altering a few things down under for the champ. Superplex attempt by the challenger is blocked with headbutts resulting in the Miz being opened up by his own counter, and it gets worse as M.V.P is straight back up for the top rope belly-to-belly. Time for some ballin’ and feel free to add your own prison rape joke there, which gets a 2-count, and like the Worm, should NEVER get the win.


Big Show pulls his partner out the ring only for Mark Henry to attack, charging at his foe only to get nothing but barricade as the World’s Strongest Man crashes through. Back in the ring and despite his partners’ problems, M.V.P has control of the match, until he misses a Yakuza kick in the corner, where the Big Show sneaks in a knockout punch allowing a 3-count for the Miz…because he’s awesome, and I allowed one mark moment during the review.


Winner and still United States Champion: The Miz


In a strange moment we see the trainer attending to Miz’s busted head, it’s almost as if they don’t want too much blood on the WWE programming…Conspiracies aside, this was an O.K match, which didn’t really get going in my opinion.


Our attention is turned to earlier events in the evening – Legacy’s actions, and Batista’s impromptu title win. And now it’s time for our main event, the Smackdown Elimination Chamber, or as it should be known – ‘Who Edge will face at Wrestlemania.’


WWE World Heavyweight Champion The Undertaker vs. Chris Jericho vs. C. M. Punk vs. Rey Mysterio vs. John Morrison vs. R-Truth


Rey Mysterio first, looking like one of the Emperor Palpatine’s guards who was too short to make the final cut of Return of the Jedi. John Morrison is number 2, slow motion and all. Stryker is back on form by informing us this is Morrison’s chance to shed his innocence. WTF?! Jericho is third, Cole points out how Jericho won his first world title in this arena, and we all remember how well that run went. Our final man in the pods is the current champ, the Undertaker. Half an hour later he makes it to the ring, I manage to fulfil a British stereotype by making a cup of tea during this entrance. C. M. Punk is next out, and has a few words for us. Much like when he preached during the Rumble, I enjoy heel Punk, straightedge works better when you appear better than everyone else.


R-Truth is our final entrant to start the match with Punk and no one gains real control until the match spills outside. Firstly we get a catapult from Truth sending Punk into the chamber wall, followed by the straightedge saviour being hurled into it as well. Truth goes up top and cannonballs into his path meaning we’ve had nearly as many bumps in this match as we did in our last chamber match. The action goes back into the ring where missed finisher attempts eventually leads to a stiff kick by Punk, a GTS and we already have our first elimination! 


With his spare moments Punk has fund a mic and begins telling the Undertaker how he better wish he’s out last. He urges us the viewers to touch the screen, and as I feel the urge to abstain from alcohol, I remember just how many drinks I might be bought at my wedding in a couple of weeks – sobriety be damned! Countdown interrupts our sermon and Mysterio is out. High-flying offence gets a 2-count. A 619 attempt is stopped by a powerslam but a failed GTS is turned into a hurricanrana pin, which everyone including myself expected a 3-count of.


Great spot on the outside as Punk catches another hurricanrana attempt and swings Mysterio twice into the chamber. It only gets a 2-count however as Mysterio is higher up the food chain than Truth. Some fighting on the turnbuckle leads to yet another hurricanrana as Punk lands outside, and rolls back into a top rope splash meaning we wont see Punk vs. ‘Taker tonight.


The countdown is nicely times with that elimination to give us Jericho who ends up knocked on his ass right away but a clothesline changes the mood. Jericho rolls out the ring as Mysterio jumps outside meeting nothing but cage. Back in the ring, Mysterio manages to lock in a Dragon Sleeper! He does however look like a child hugging his half naked parent and I’ll leave you with that disturbing image as Jericho reverses the hold into the Walls. 10-count means John Morrison will be joining us as the action spills outside with Morrison kicking a highflying Rey. The favour is returned when Mysterio pushes the turnbuckle-bound John into a pod making a nice sound. Our high-spot tally goes up as Morrison connects with a flying kick to Jericho who was in the midst of a wheelbarrow/bulldog attempt by Mysterio.


Split-legged moonsault on Rey gets a 2-count…holy crap it got a 3 count! Was not expecting that. So that leaves Jericho, Morrison, and the Undertaker waiting patiently inside his pod, but not for long as he enters with Jericho running into his fists and getting a snake-eyes/big boot combo. A double chokeslam attempt is turned into a double suplex as Morrison is dumped outside so Jericho can turn his attention to the champ. An ill-advised slap to the face leads to the amusing sight of Jericho attempting to hide in a pod, but to no avail as Taker pounds the crap out of him. Before the Deadman can feed on the youth on John Morrison however, the superstar hits Taker with another of his springboard kicks. But rather than going for a pin, he goes for another moonsault which meets nothing but knees.


Jericho starts to make his way back into the ring, only for the Undertaker to rise back up, scaring the former Y2J back into his pod, more successfully this time. Morrison is thrown out of the ring to set up for a powerbomb when Jericho decides now is the time to make a move pushing Taker into the cage whilst the former ECW champ clings onto the cage for dear life, waiting to drop on Jericho. Shining wizard gets a 2-count in the ring, but John turns round and catches a chokeslam to the outside, with Taker dragging him back in for the pin, and we’re down to two.


Big Undertaker/Y2J chant going down as Jericho once again runs into some fists where MMA skills are apparently is part of mortuary training. Taker misses a boot in the corner allowing Jericho to set up a superplex, but only one person gets to pin Mr McCool for 3 and Y2J doesn’t have the breasts for it. The next minute is spent between Walls of Jericho attempts and Hell’s Gate…oh WWE, you teases! Stupid move next as Jericho climbs the turnbuckle to give the champ ten punches that as we all know leads to the Last Ride. As we get the signal for the Tombstone, Shawn Michaels manages to make his way into the chamber. One Sweet Chin Music later, we have ourselves a WrestleMania feud and a new world champ!


Winner and new World Champion: Chris Jericho


HBK stares down at Taker as the new champ makes his way up the ramp clutching his title, and that’s how we leave this one folks!


This chamber match was definitely better than the first, with more action going on, and the ending worked well, as I’m sure fans were looking forward to Michaels/Taker II. John Morrison was made to look good, whilst R-Truth ring entrance seemed to last longer than his in-ring time!


Overall – Admittedly I have not watched a PPV in a while, but this one was entertaining minus the NXT crap and the so-so Divas tag match. Both chambers were fine, but the Raw one was too choppy. Kane/MacIntyre wasn’t as bad as I expected, whereas Miz/MVP wasn’t as good as I would’ve hoped. Overall, I’d Give Elimination Chamber 2010 a thumbs up.

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