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DEADFACE WALKING!:
(06/21/10)
By Catherine Perez
 
In celebration of Monday night's acknowledgment of Darren Young's almost uncanny resemblance to John Cena, WWE Films brings you another stinker that's sure to please (as in "please, put me out of my misery")~!
With unnecessary remakes becoming the norm in Hollywood, it was only right that WWE Films attempt to siphon a few million dollars out of the Hollywood piggy bank with SOUL MAN. Where the original had C. Thomas Howell in embarrassingly unconvincing black-face, this one has Cena and Young teaming up to bring you at least 5% more laughs than before. At least. Don't quote me on that. SOUL MAN: a movie with heart and soul... and rampant racism! Written and directed by Michael Hayes.

 
SEND FEEDBACK TO CATHERINE PEREZ
 
Catherine Perez is a proud owner of three e-mails from WWE's legal department, which she regularly prints out for when all the toilet paper runs out.  She was the first person to call the Ghostbusters after witnessing something strange in her neighborhood, and is thus immortalized in a song that was made popular four years before her birth.  Catherine enjoys collecting vintage WWF t-shirts, painting on her clothing, and the smell of crushed dreams in the mornings. She also shot J.R.

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TWF FLASHBACK

November 2006

SATIRE: DISCONTINUED WWE XMAS PRODUCTS!

by Sean Carless

With Christmas just around the corner, what better way to spend your few remaining dollars (left over after the seemingly infinite line-up of fucking pay-per-views ) then on the following "quality WWE merchandise!" After all, if they don't move this stuff, and fast, stockholders just might get time to figure out what "plummeting domestic buyrates" means!... and well, I don't think they need to tell you what that means! (Seriously. They're not telling you. Everything is fine! Ahem.).